DIAMOND: YOU CAN AFFORD IT

Well, some of you might have thought I would be talking about money, but not so.  I have found that there is something that has a whole lot more value than money could ever have and you could never put an actual price on it and that is self-respect. You cannot purchase it at a store, but yet it is so essential.  They do not sell it anywhere, but yet everyone needs to have it.  Once you lose it, it is difficult to get back, but yet you need it.  Nobody can give it to you, but it's important that you hold on to it.

It is because of lack of self respect many women feel as if they should be more or less discriminating in relationships.  In other words, there are the women who live and die by obtaining a man who can only buy them whatever they want, do not care about the anointing, love, being equally yoked, or anything remotely resembling Jesus.  These we will call "diamond girls".  It is strictly all about the benjamins and nothing else.  I will say this, that it takes less self-respect for a diamond than any of the other kinds of women.  A diamond will sell herself for a dollar and a ring.  She values herself less than the woman with what we would consider the lowest self-esteem.  Even a woman who we classify as such, has more self-respect than to give herself away for money.  A diamond has some real issues with herself in general.  She doesn't care for herself and her worth.  Who she is and what she represents is what she has and what she can put on.  She believes she is being smart by holding out for the biggest bidder or the man with the biggest bank account.  But, she does not feel she is anything unless there is a price tag attached to her person.  She looks down on herself unless she can attain only what money can buy.  Therefore she seeks after a man that can supply her financial needs and ignores her spiritual needs. She looks down on others for what they don't have, but truly she is the one that is lacking in so many areas of her life. 

There are so many diamond girls within the church.  These are the women who pursue position clawing and backbiting.  These are the women that seek after people within the church who stand in great positions.  They seek after being put in high places.  They are much like Jezebel in that they are manipulative and aggressively seeking after that which they are not entitled to.  They will sell you out and anybody who gets in their way to obtain their prize.  If they have to change the script to make you look like you did something wrong to take you out of the field so that they will be the only girl out there filling their basket in the light of the day, they will do it.  Just like Jezebel who manipulated her husband to steal the land of Naboth.  Diamonds are ruthless women and they look like they have high self-esteem, but in reality they are unsure of themselves and therefore must tear down other people to look elevated rather than working on a level playing field.  These are the diamonds.

I'm only going to be talking about the diamonds today, but we will be talking about other jewels such as the ruby and pearl. I speak to the diamonds today and tell you that you are worth more than you are selling yourself for.  Giving your goods aways for any price is not worth it.  You deserve all that God has for you.  You can afford to give God time to work on you and prepare you for who you need rather than chasing what can never fulfill you. Jezebels' end speaks to what happens to women who manipulate their way into relationships and in life.  There is no good end to giving yourself away to the highest bidder.  Your price is far above what any man could ever pay except he be the savior, Jesus Christ.  You were already bought with a price, the blood of the lamb.  You've already been purchased with a price that nothing else could compare to or stand up to.  I used a diamond to express the fact that it is unbreakable, valuable, and even in its uncut state, still unmistakeably beautiful.  This is why everyone seeks after a diamond.  The only problem is that in most cases a diamond doesn't even know she's a jewel because she's too busy trying to be less than what she is.

TELL THE TRUTH, SHAME THE DEVIL

And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free. (John 8:32)

Doing what's true and knowing the truth are two very different things.  We need to not pretend like we don't know who we are, how we are, and what's in us.  Maybe some of us don't really know what's in us or are afraid to acknowledge it.  I don't say that in a negative way, but if we do know what's in us then why is it so difficult when someone else points out the very thing that you already know about yourself.  If we cannot even embrace who we are and deal with our own idiosyncrasies, then how do we expect someone else to put up with them?

We expect that someone else will be willing to deal with what we are not even willing to deal with within ourselves.  We got issues, but we don't want anyone else to acknowledge that we've got issues, but just learn to deal with it.  Frankly, that's some twisted thinking.  Sometimes we can't even stand ourselves. We laugh at just how ridiculous we are and behave.  We pray that God will change us and fix us.  Then we act as if we don't know there's issues going on with us when someone else points it out.  Hello somebody, but that is just plain off the wall as Michael Jackson would say. 

The word of God is the only remedy for keeping us in check.  It gives us checks and balances so we won't seem mentally unstable in our behavior and attitude.  Let's be honest, women can seem a little bit off balanced in the way we think and behave if we don't keep our flesh under the blood.  We can come unglued in a New York minute and make men wonder who in the world is this and where is the woman I was talking to five minutes ago.  So, the word of God is there to keep us balanced so that we do not forget that we are tri-part and to make sure that we attend to the whole of us.  It tells us that we must not be a hearer only, but a doer of the word (James 1:22).  We must put the word in practice because it is relevant for our lives and it molds our character.  Our character and attitude is trained to behave like our flesh, adhere to things that appease us and make us feel good.  But the word teaches us to do the things that please the Father.  When we do not keep the word built up in us and call the word up out of us when life happens we live out of our flesh man and become who God never intended us to be and who we know we are trying not to be. 

Jesus said if you continue in my word, then you are disciples and you shall know the truth and the TRUTH will make you free.  So there is more than just one thing going on here.  It's not enough to do one.  You must continue in the word to be a disciple.  If you do not continue in the word, then you are not a disciple.  Keeping the commandments of the word makes you a disciple.  Then he goes further in saying that after being a disciple then you will know the truth.  In other words after you continue in his word or doing his word your discipleship will teach you what the truth is and from this revelation you draw freedom.

If you continue in my word, you'll be a disciple.  If you continue in my word you shall know the truth.  If you continue in my word the truth will make you free.  But what happens if we don't continue in his word?  There is nothing in us to shine a light on the things that make us fall short.  There is nothing in us to expose what's in us that is not Godly. There is nothing in us that will show us that we are not operating in truth.  This is what happens when we do not continue in the word.  So, when someone points out to us that we have junk going on and that we're a hot mess, the reason we can't see it is because there is not enough word in us to reveal the truth to us!  How can a disciple of something be truly committed to that thing if they haven't read the rule book?  You can't play football competitively without knowing the game.  You will be just a player running around on the field getting in every body's way. You won't know where to set up, which side to be on when on offense or defense.  You won't know anything because you haven't read the book. 

I said all of that to say this.....we tend to act like we forget who we are when we deal with people especially when it comes to dealing with the opposite sex.  We know that we act some kind of crazy when we have skipped a few days of prayer.  We know we go completely bananas when somebody says something we don't like or agree with.  But we tend to forget all of that, you know about who you really are, when we get into a relationship.  We tend to act like we don't know how off colored we could be if we don't keep ourselves in check with the word and prayer.  When we get into a relationship the truth about who we are becomes eschewed.  We can see the fault in everything and everybody else and ignore the foolishness in us.  It's really easy to do when the light is off in us.

It's time to start telling the truth about what you see in yourself.  The only way you will ever see what's wrong is to use the resources of the word to expose the mess that's there.  The word will reveal the foolishness and when somebody else says something about it, you will already know and have a dish towel out to clean up the mess.  Revelation about yourself is hard to deal with and handle.  But the only way to a better you, less confusion in your life, is to make sure the light is always on.  The light is the light of the word, Jesus Christ.  Make sure he is always shining brightly in your life to reveal whatever is hidden in you so that you will never be confused about who you are.

God's blessings to you over the weekend and may he keep you in his grace, Amen!

TOO EASY

Observation and experience has taught me that no man wants to be run down and chased by a woman.  Not a good man and not even a bad one.  The bad one's grow tired of it and dismiss you after they have had their fill of you and gotten whatever they want.  The good one's cannot be bothered with a woman who values herself so little that she doesn't believe she is worth the effort. 

Why are you trying to run them down sista's?  Don't you know who you are?There is huge difference between putting yourself in the field to be seen and throwing yourself at someone.  It's annoying to them, trust me, they don't like it.  It's annoying and unattractive, and makes you look desperate.  It lowers your worth in their eyes.  Some men start out thinking you're fabulous until they find out you are an easy conquest, then they quickly lose interest.

The problem with many church girls, women, and just women in general is that other people value us more than we do ourselves.  When we cannot see the value in who we are then we operate out of a place of need rather than want.  I discussed some time ago the difference between wanting and needing someone in our lives.  My blog post entitled "I DON'T NEED A MAN". Our completion is our savior Christ Jesus, because we are complete in him.  While we are single we should be satisfied with being the bride of Christ.  But because our flesh has replaced what our spirit is lacking, then we want to substitute what we really need for what we think we need.  What we really need is more time with God, but because we our not adequately equipped spiritually we try to put something in the place where God should abide.  If had not been down this road, I could certainly not share this with you today.  It is all too common among women, that we try to fill a space with something or someone.  If it's not food then it's people or a man.  It's like we need to have something or someone in every corner of our lives to make us feel like we are satisfied or adequate. 

But there is only sufficiency in Christ Jesus and no amount of things or people will ever be able to compensate for the longing that is deep within us.  That place in us is a place that only God can abide.  Food can't fill it and people cannot fill it.  That is the reason that women become easy.  Easy targets, easy prey, easy to conquer, and easy to overtake.  We lose perspective on what is really lacking in us and try to get filled up with something or someone other than what was intended to fill us up.  That's why you will see women constantly calling, emailing, texting, and trying to run down a man.  You need something but you haven't realized that it's not really a man you need.  There is something in us that longs for God, but many people replace that longing with the wrong things.  As a result of this missing element, a woman can make herself too available and start reaching out to things and people to fill up her emptiness.  It reminds me of the song, "Fill my cup Lord, I lift it up Lord, come and fill this thirsty soul of mine, bread of heaven feed me till I want no more, fill my cup Lord, I lift it up Lord". There is a thirst in us, but it is for the bread of heaven, not for other things.  We just need to realize this.

We have to get to a place where we are so full of the Holy spirit that we live in the overflow and not just have enough anointing to sustain us, but enough to spill over so that we never run dry.  When we live in the overflow we will not fall victim to being needy and wanting for things or people to fulfill us where God can only fulfill us.  We will not live in lack, but abundance.  We will not stay in a dry place but a place that is watered with the Holy spirit.  That's a place we need to be and a place we need to stay.  When we live in this place we will not be so easy the enemy tricks us out and derails our character, witness, and value.  There is a place where God abides behind his wing where you can hide.  Find yourself in that place and you will never be "easy" again.  You will be discerning and aware of the enemies tactics and devices.  You will use wisdom in your decision making.  You will wait on God instead of trying to lead God. You will hear rather than talk.  You will be a woman who understands her value and demands the respect that this value represents.

Don't you wanna be that girl? That woman of God......Yes, I pray for everyone of you reading this on today.  God has something in store, let's just wait to see what it is.  If you see Boaz somewhere, don't chase him to the four corners of the earth.  No, just put yourself together, get out in the field and work where he can see you.  Trust me, he has his eye on you, but he doesn't want a woman that will make a spectacle of herself.  He wants a woman who is well respected, Godly, decent, and knows how to present herself without lowering her value.

Love you ladies and God bless and keep your face down at the Master's feet.

WHAT YOU GOT STORED UP?

A good man out of the good treasure of his heart bringeth forth that which is good; and an evil man out of the evil treasure of his heart bringeth forth that which is evil: for of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaketh. (Luke 6:45)

I love this particular passage of scripture that we will be referencing today.  Often people will just quote the later part of the scripture and not give the entire reference the attention it needs.  The first part is relevant to the last part of the scripture.

I referred one day on my facebook status that a man who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord.  Then I went on to ask if when a man finds you if he will in fact find a good thing and favor or a hot mess and a curse. Let's roll that around in her head for a minute.  So, often women think and believe they are wonderful for the mere fact of how they look, how they dress, where they shop, etc.  But the things that make us wonderful are not superficial things.  Certainly God has made us magnificent creations.  I do not dispute that fact, but he put awesome things within us that make up our ability to be wonderful as well.  The God on the inside of us makes us wonderful on the inside.  We are fearfully and wonderfully made, but it is not just talking about our exterior because we are mind, body, and soul.  There is so much more to what is on the outside of us that makes us so spectacular!

When I look at this scripture I see a couple of key things here.  It says a good man out of the good treasure of his heart.  First of all, a good man can have more in that storage than just good things.  It says out of the "good" treasure of his heart he brings forth that which is good.  So, this let's me know that he, the good man, has the option to pull from whatever resource he wants.  He can pull from that which is good or he can choose to pull from that which is not.  But a truly good man knows to pull from the treasures or the things stored in him that are good and that is what makes him a good man.  He doesn't pull from his flesh and that's key.  He knows the difference through maturity, prayer, meditation of the word as to what is acceptable and pleasing to God.  So, when, the good man, goes to make a decision in life, he pulls from the treasure of resources that is good before he speaks anything into the atmosphere. 

Now, I'm going somewhere with this today.  But an evil man pulls on resources that are not Godly.  Though there may be some goodness in there, his choice is to pull from other resources in what he can do to please himself rather than God.  For whatever resource or treasure you pull from defines what's really in your heart. We make decisions based on what resources we are working with.  This is the reason some Christians constantly make bad decisions.  It's because there is nothing in them to pull from that can help them make a right decision.  What's in that treasure box?  Is there any prayer in there or any word in there?  Is there anything in that treasure box that can assist you in life?

My point today is that we keep making the same bad decisions in life because we are not stored up with goodness.  We have slipped in our prayers lives.  We are low on the word of God.  We rely on a weekly feeding and our spirit is riding on fumes so that when it comes time in our lives to know what we need to do, perhaps say no when it needs to be said, or you're not for me, etc., we can't do that because we suddenly are confused.  But a good man knows to store something in him that will help him when the storms of life come.  He has something in the cupboard that he can go to get when he needs a word for a situation.  He knows that the harvest will not always be plentious so therefore, he must keep the word of God hid in his heart at all times, so when things get where he cannot get to his outside resource, he has an inside resource that he can pull out to give him wisdom and strength in life.

A good man knows that whatever treasure that is in your heart, is what will come up out of you.  He has to keep something in him that will help him continue to be a good man.  Sometimes people wonder why they say yes in a situation or why they went completely out of character.  It's what you got in storage that you are pulling from that directs what your mouth is saying.  People don't suddenly go out of character.  Your character changes with what you put in you.  Junk in, junk out.  Good in, good out. Anybody is capable of acting a complete mess at any given moment. Yes, things in life will challenge your character, but at the end of the day, what's in you should prevail and whether it's a good thing or an evil thing is entirely up to you. You want to be a good woman, then put in you what is required to be a good woman.  Don't rely on your beauty to get you over.  That will all fade away.  But what will keep a man coming back is what you have in your heart.  When it comes time to make a decision about whether you will get a ring or not, they're not looking at how pretty you are, but whether they can deal with you day in and out for the rest of their lives.  There are many beautiful women sitting at home right now by themselves every day of the week.  At the end of the day, no man wants to deal with a woman that doesn't have good things stored in her. 

So, did you put Jesus on the menu today or is he only on the menu Sunday? Just asking..... Let your heart be a true reflection of the wonderful creation God made you to be.  Indeed God did a good thing when he created woman for man.  But be certain of this, if you want somebody to know it then keep that creation as wonderful on INSIDE as it is on OUTSIDE. As always, we love you and hugs and kisses in Jesus!

IF YOU DON'T KNOW ASK SOMEBODY

I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well. (Ps 139:14)

Do you know who I am? A king's daughter, beautifully and wonderfully made.  A chose vessel, called before the foundation, accepted in the beloved.  Do you know who I am?  That's a question sometimes you have to ask men who assume that they are all together lovely and wonderful and you are blessed one to get them because their breath smells like roses when they rise up in the morning.  I know I'm being very dramatic on today, but I think you get my point.  First let me say this, a man who finds a wife, finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord, not the opposite.  So, a man would do well to find such a treasure as you or me.

It is funny to me that so many assume the opposite and so many sisters fall into the trap of thinking that they are not prize, when in fact we are the prize.  We are the prize that gets God's attention when we get connected to the man that he has set aside for us.  We are the prize that gives that man something extra from God that he didn't have before.  So, don't give your power away so easily to somebody who doesn't deserve the prize you are.  You are a treasure.

I was sitting and it came up in my spirit how sometimes men think we're supposed to chase and pursue them and go out of our way to make them want us.  That's so out of order, so not consistent with God's plan.  Although, it is in fact not out of order to put yourself in the field where you can be noticed, it is way out of order to chase somebody down.  A while back I blogged on Ruth and how she put herself out in the field so that her near kinsmen could take notice of her.  If a man doesn't know you exist, never laid eyes on you, then clearly it would be difficult for him to find you.  She made it easy to be found, she made it convenient, but she was still a lady and carried herself as such.  She got out and worked.  She didn't get out there and pimp and prance dressed in crazy clothes to stand out. The mistake that some women make is they get out of order, out of line, and just ungodly with their behavior when they see a man who might interest them.  It is so obvious to him that you are trying to run him down.  Trust me, they will run far away in the opposite direction.

You have to also remember that Ruth proposed marriage to Boaz by presenting herself to him according to their customs (Ruth 3).  This is not something that the traditional church talks about, but it still remains a fact according to the word of God.  Boaz had to set things in order before he could accept, but it was Ruth who initiated the marriage.  Now, what do we think of that? Out of order? Well, according to everything we've been taught it is out of order.  We get our customs from the word of God and in most instances it is done the other way around and not in this manner, but can I say that this is out of order, not so sure.  The whole thing was the plan of God, so how God makes things happen is entirely his decision.  Am I telling you to run out and propose marriage, absolutely not.  What I'm saying is we have to be led by God in all that we say and do.  How God does something may not be traditional, conventional, or average.  He doesn't change, but his mind is unlike our minds and we do not know how or what he is going to do and how he's going to do it.  We have to stay open to whatever God wants to do and how he wants to do it.  There are so many women just sitting around looking pretty on the third pew in church and have been there for years.  These women are watching other sisters come up in the church and marry the man they've been sitting there looking at for 10 years.  I'm not saying propose, but I'm saying get out in the field! Stop sitting on the sidelines starring blankly into space. 

It's kind of difficult and sketchy because you have one person telling no we don't do that and another saying you better do that.  The most important thing I want you to know is, listen to that still small voice inside you and move when God says move.  Get your feet moving and know who you are and what you have to offer.  Put your head up and walk like the daughter that you are.  Let me help you rest yourself in who you are.  You are fearfully and wonderfully made.  The way God designed you, woman is so particular and unique.  You are phenomenal.  Just walking into a room garners attention.  So, nothing extra is needed.  We don't need gimmicks or gadgets, all we need is who we are and God in us to get what God has for us.  God has put so much into just making you woman. He wrapped a body around an angular organ pulled from the side of man whom he took from the ground so that he could call you woman.  He took his time to structure you differently as to make you a compatible mate for the man.  God did that so that there would be something special about you. 

There are those who would say there is nothing special about a woman, but I beg to differ. A woman has much to offer.  But you have to ask yourself this, "Why would God take his time for this creation and it be nothing special?" The Lord knew what he was doing when he pulled the female out of the male.  This is why when a man and woman get married they are one flesh because the flesh that God pulled out is returned again to the man.  Now, tell me, is that not something wonderful that God did?

So, the next the time somebody tries to treat you like you don't matter, let them know who you are.  You are fearfully and wonderfully made.  The favor of God comes with you and a man would do well to have such a blessing in his life. God did a good thing when he constructed you.  There's nothing not wonderful about you.  God's handiwork is good and if you don't know you better ask somebody!

WHO'S HANDMAIDEN ARE YOU?

Who are you truly today? I often refer to myself as the handmaiden of God.  A handmaiden is a servant one who works diligently to do the service of the one she is assigned to serve.  She is faithful to her charge and does not neglect her duties.  She is passionate about whom she serves.  Her desire is to please her Lord.  A friend reminded me on yesterday of this very important word and it comes from:

I Corinthians 7:34 (NIV) and his interests are divided. An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord's affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world--how she can please her husband.

A married woman's responsibility and desires are focus entirely different than a woman who is single and/or a virgin.  A married woman is focused on her husband and how she may please him and serve him, but a single woman's focus should be to her Lord in how she may please and serve him.  Many of us are confused about who we are and where we are in life.  Some of the confusion comes from having been married but thrust back into being single which has left some of us confused about our position and where we fit.  It was never God's desire that the saints would divorce, but this is the age in which we live so we must deal with what we have.  Well, then there are the unmarried women who have never been married but because some have cohabited, not remained virgins they too have a compromised mentality of positioning spiritually.

Understanding how to get back to purity in our minds is a process.  It obviously cannot be changed were our bodies are concerned that's why it is more difficult once you are exposed to being in a physical relationship to go back to being in a spiritual relationship only.  However, it is not impossible.  Your body can adjust over time when you put it under the word, continue in prayer and fasting, and most importantly love God enough to commit to him fully.  When you are single your body belongs to God.  Giving yourself to someone who you are not married to violates your commitment and relationship with the Lord.  I've had men tell me, "I could never marry somebody I haven't been with".  That's why they will tell you this to make you violate your commitment.  The realness is they don't plan on marry you anyway.  If the prerequisite is playing married, he already has the wrong idea about what real commitment and relationship is from a biblical perspective.  He does not want you to be covered because he is so willingly ready to uncover in the Lord's eyes. This is much like Adam and Eve walking through the garden trying to cover their sin because their disobedience separated them from the relationship they once had with God.

When you violate your body, you are violating the Lord's body because your body belongs to God.  Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; (I Cor 6:19). You are not to be controlled by your sinful nature, but by the Spirit of God (Rom 8:9). So when you give your body away outside the word of God or in violation of God's word, you commit spiritual adultery because your body is in marriage relationship with God.  God has not given you away in marriage so you have stepped outside of that marriage.  It is much the same as having a natural relationship and being with another man when you are married to someone else.  You make the same vow and commitment to God that you are making with a man.  As his handmaiden you are committed to keeping his word, walking in his word, and serving him. 

So I ask you today, "Are you God's handmaiden?"  As his handmaiden and a single woman your desire should be to please him, serve him, and do unto him more than a married woman could ever do for her husband.  When you are single you have the time to give yourself to prayer, fasting, scripture without distraction.  You have the time to put your hands to work to be about kingdom building.  You have the time to do all you can to please your Lord.  Where are the handmaidens of the Lord who toil in prayer all night consecrating and praying for the sick?  Where are the handmaidens of the Lord when the Lord has need of you working in the vineyards?  Are you somewhere on somebody’s lap or somewhere laying before the Lord waiting for instruction?

Purity in your mind and heart can only be found in God's presence and in God's word.  Hear ye the word of the Lord today!  Strive to be a true handmaiden of God.  Strive to be a vessel fit and meek for the Master's use.  Have a blessed and prosperous weekend beloveds and keep your oil lamp trimmed and burning!

IS THERE SOMETHING IN ME

What do you do when you seem to be drawing all the wrong kind of men, counterfeits, throwbacks, and the like? I’m glad you asked me that question because that is one I had to ask the Lord myself.  For one while there it seemed there was a sign on my head that said, “All men shorter than me stop right here”.  Then another while there was a sign apparently on my head that read, “All uncircumcised philistines stop here”.  Mounting frustration with the constant counterfeits that always got a word about how you are their wife.  You want to scream to some of them, news flash….I’ve got the Holyghost too and God didn’t tell me that because he certainly has not changed his mind about what he did tell me.

Well, drawing the wrong man to you could be a number of things but from a spiritual perspective I will share with you two issues.  The first is that it is spirits that you are drawing not people.  Let’s be clear in that.  Many people say the enemy will send to you just what you want; well it depends on the season that you are in.  When you are in a season where God is transitioning you and preparing you for elevation and what he has next for you, then the enemy brings in what you like to distract you.  Clearly, all of the things that are not distraction to you, it’s not on his radar when he (the enemy doesn’t see a shift occurring in your life).  But when there is no shift occurring, then the enemy sends stuff to frustrate you and aggravate you to the core to cause you to question your effectiveness and who you are.

The things that come your way largely have to do with you, where you are spiritually and what you are putting out.  Insecurity pulls like spirits to itself just as arrogance, or controlling spirits.  There are men that prey on women with insecurity issues and they can sense it.  They pick up on that spirit that’s on you and run to it.  It’s a door of opportunity for them to get a foothold in your life.  They’re like flies hanging around something that appeals to them.  Whatever it is that has attached to you, that you have not been completely delivered from, the enemy uses as window of opportunity to see where he can launch an attack and do damage.  Yes, there are issues from our past that we have suffered and never denounced that remain attached to us and until we release them out of our spirit then they are dormant.  You ever wonder how you could end up doing some of the very things you said you would never, ever do?  That’s some stuff that was in you, that you have not denounced and been set free from. 

I’ve been down that road a few times and I can say this…I looked down at myself in my mess and wondered how I got there.  The bottom line is if we do not address our past it affects our future. At some point we have to acknowledge what’s in us if we ever want to be delivered and if we ever want to draw the person purposed for our lives. 

The second thing is this, you think that you are drawing people who are not on the same spiritual level as you because you are prophet, apostle, evangelist, pastor, teacher, preacher Suzy Q. Well, I have news, you might think you’re wonderful, but you may not be way up there in the Spirit where you think you are, so you really are attracting people on your level, but assuming that they aren’t.  I know that might be a little harsh, but didn’t I always say I would keep it real.  Again, let me say I’ve been there, okay.  I’ve had my wonderful moment where I thought I prophesy, preach, sing, prayer, lay hands, and am all things to all people, every body’s type, etc., etc., etc…..You know.  I’ve been there.  The bottom line is we cannot think of ourselves more highly than we ought.  Deliverance is so wonderful, because all of that is insecurity too.  It’s just the other side of insecurity over compensating instead of getting set free.  You’ve got to realize what is in you and be willing to acknowledge and want to be delivered from it.  There is a reason why certain types of people are drawn to you.  When you stop putting out certain things, then what comes to you will change.  When you are willing to admit that there is an issue in you that needs to be addressed, then change can truly come.  But if you have arrived and are unwilling to call those things out of you that keep you in a place disconnected from the promises God has for you, then you limit your ability to embrace your destiny.  You position yourself to not walk into your promise.  You stop God’s ability to transition you and take you to the next level.

You have to be willing to ask yourself this question “Is there something on me?”  Is there something I need to address?  If you drawing the wrong kind of man to you; this is certainly a question that you should ask.  What season are you in?  If you’re not in transition then discern what you’re drawing.  Have a most blessed day wonderful women of God.  I’ve got to end it here, but stay encouraged.

HAVE I NOT SAID IT?

The LORD Almighty has sworn, "Surely, as I have planned, so it will be, and as I have purposed, so it will stand. (Isaiah 14:24)

No more doubts in your mind on today women of God.  The Lord wants me to share a strong word of encouragement with you today! I was laying down in my bed and suddenly a very sorrowful spirit came over me and began to weep.  But in this, it was not the spirit of the Lord, but it was the enemy who had planted seed in my head.  Then as suddenly as it came, it was gone, because the Spirit of the Lord rose up in me and said spoke against the attack.  It was the spirit of lonliness that overcome me and I have never felt such an attack of it.  It's interesting that when things are well working on assignments God has you on, the enemy will send an attack from out of the north.  So, why wasn't I aware, but I was. There is always something in you that draws these attacks.  So, it's not out of no where.  There's a little part of you that longs for fellowship with someone other than your God, your girls, and your family.

Our scripture says, surely, as I have planned, so it will be.  We have been talking in the last blog about missed opportunities and that God had to propel you into the place that you are in for this season, so we will continue down that road.  God had already planned and set you apart for this particular season that you are in right now.  It is not by coincidence, by accident, but it is by divine predestination that you are here right now, at this place, at this time, and in this condition.  The Lord planned it and because he planned it, it had to be.  Now the method in which you arrived had much to do with the decisions that you made.  But where you end up is where God wanted you to be.  Whether you decide to allow him to take you where he wants to take you is entirely up to you.  But God, did plan it this way, so that you would have an opportunity to say yes Lord or no Lord, I'm not doing it.  It is by his design that your life would bring you to a place where purpose could be birthed in you.  What you do with the baby is your option.  Some people get pregnant in the natural and decide to have an abortion.  Getting pregnant in the Spirit, you have that same option of aborting the baby.  When your purpose comes calling to you, God will bust up everything in your life, your pathway to get you to see what's right in front of you!

Trust me, I know this. When your purpose calls your name, you have the option of answering or ignoring the call.  Whether you decide to answer it or not, the purpose that is on your life does not go away because you choose not to step into it.  So, in other words, as Isaiah 14 says, it will stand.  It's not going anywhere.  He ordained it and predestined it.  That's why some marriages had to get busted up.  That's why some friendships did not last.  That's why you couldn't stay on that job you valued so much.  It's because when your purpose is calling you out everything else has to come to a halt so you can hear.  God has to silence all the distractions so you can hear him calling you out.  Some people have to go through hell before they are willing to listen and some just step up as soon as God begins to speak to them.  Some folk cracked it up, ended up on the street, lost their minds, or totally checked out. But hear me in the Spirit, when the Lord begins to shut things down and people down around you, open up your spiritual ears and hear what the Lord is saying.

If God said it, do not dismay.  He will fulfill his plan concerning you.  When your purpose is calling whatever is in the way will be moved so that he can give you your assignment.  If it is impeding the progress of kingdom, then God will move it out of the way.  Don't be discouraged over loss of relationships, material things, or any other loss.  I have lost all of those things, relationships, material positions, money, friendships but the purpose of God will be fulfilled in my life inspite of the losses.  When you have blinders on to who you are sometimes it takes a shaking to get you to wake up and see what is in you.

I know I'm going into a different area today, but this is what the Lord had in my spirit.  Know this, that God indeed has a plan set before you and he has his hand on your life.  Walk into your purpose with your eyes on him and everything else in life will align just as he has planned it.  God bless you loves!

MISSED OPPORTUNITIES

I know some of you have thought probably more often than not about the many opportunities you may have missed in life.  Like if I had done this differently or if I had married him instead I would be in different circumstances right now.  Whatever the what if is and the thing you felt was a missed opportunity.  I've come to encouragement you today to tell you "we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose" (Rom 8:28).

The what ifs in our life are always going to be there.  But I tell you this if God had not ordained it to be so, then it would not have been.  The Lord orchestrated everything in your pathway to flow the way it has gone.  If he had not had his hand on you, you would not have the opportunity today to look back over your life and reminisce about the things you believe you should have done differently.  Your life is on the road that God designed for you to travel.  He propelled you into singleness so that you could be more effective to minister to those who are flowing in the same vein as you.  You could not preach, teach, or testify about how God has kept you, taken care of you, and been your husband unless you had walked down the same road of some of these other women.  It's really easy for a married woman to tell you to hold on and keep your legs closed when she doesn't have to, but when somebody like me tells you that, I'm first preaching to myself, then you.  If I tell you hold on and keep it on lock, it's because I have, I can, and I do.  I know that it can be done and that God will in fact keep you if it is your desire that he be your husband at this appointed time.

There is a reason for your singleness.  The things you deem as missed opportunities, are not missed opportunities.  They are birthed testimonies so that you can say that the Lord positioned you for such a time as this to walk out this journey so that you can bless somebody else's life in your singleness.  I know it might be hard to understand the whys of why am I not married.  I'm telling you don't allow the enemy to play pitipatty with your mind and let that be your focus.  Turn your focus to your kingdom assignment.  Turn your attention to the lover of your soul and not be focused on somebody loving on your body.  At the end of the day, the lover of your soul will always be there when those who said they would love your forever walk out the door.  If they didn't walk out some of them started loving on somebody else while they were loving on you too.  Let's just be real about it.  Some of them wasn't loving you all that well anyway.  So, the things you may deem as missed opportunities, are not what the Lord had planned for you.  You didn't miss an opportunity to be blessed, you missed an opportunity to be in a mess.  The same person that you thought you should have been with would not be the same person with you.  It's about God's timing, your season, and his purpose.  If it does not align with God's plan for you, then it was never your opportunity to begin with.

All things do work together for good for them who love God....they do! For them that are "the called" according to his purpose.  Are you the called?  Has God called you and set you apart for his purpose? Has the Lord called you into the beloved into sonship?  All things work together for good for them who love God! Keep loving on God and stay in position!

FOOLERY AT IT'S BEST

Proverbs 23:7(a) For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he

Foolish is not sensible: showing, or resulting from, a lack of good sense or judgment. Many times foolishness comes from having the capacity to make wiser choices, but choosing to not do so.  Resulting in foolery which is defined as irresponsible behavior.  Having the capacity, sense, and information to make wiser choices, but choosing to not do it is both irresponsible and foolish.  Since I have adapted different lifestyle in terms of my health and well-being in the last year, I have noticed some things about people.  Especially as it relates to relationships with both men and women.  I noticed often people will treat you differently based on your body language, how you feel about yourself and treat yourself.  If you do not value yourself, then their behavior toward you further devalues you.  I find that often people want to feel more important and superior to others, so when a person is insecure it fuels their behavior toward you and invites disrespect.

I said all of that to say this.......when we are irresponsible in how we treat ourselves and devalue ourselves, it is foolish to assume that someone else will value you more than you do yourself. Foolery is abusing yourself, punishing yourself, and not appreciating the Godly vessel that you are.  Often we want other people to fuel our self-esteem and make us feel good about ourselves.  We want men in particular to treasure us, put us up on a pedestal, and even think we are wonderful based on what we think in our heads and not what we feel in our heart about ourselves.  What we think in our heads and what we know in our soul can be different and the difference is perceived in how we carry ourselves. 

Your heart reflects who you really are.  Your head can tell you, yes I am fearfully and wonderfully made, but you don't really believe it because it's not in your spirit.  When it's in your spirit, your head and heart will be in agreement with each other.  Proverbs 23:7(a) For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he.  You say, how does a man "think in his heart?"  The heart reflect the real you.  That's why the bible says "if you confess with your mouth, "Jesus is Lord," and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved" (Rom 10:9). Because it is not enough to say it with your mouth or let your head say it or think it, but it has to go deeper in you until your spirit knows what your head and mouth is saying.  When your heart believes what your head just thought then you have truly understood who you really are.  Joshua 1:8 tells us, "This book of the law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do according to all that is written in it; for then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have success." We meditate on the word so that it can go deeper than our heads, so that our spirit can wrap itself around the word and truly minister to us, speak to us, give us nuggets of wisdom and revelation, insight, understanding, and direction.  This is why you hear many preach the word, but do not grasp the Spirit of the word, because it is a surface understanding and not a Spirit translation.

We need to get a real understanding of who we are and wrap it around our spirit so that the impression that we give other people is the essence of who we really are and not just that "head girl", but the "heart girl".  So, foolery is assuming that others will treat you better than what you think of yourself.  Bring your thinking up of yourself by meditating on God's word concerning who you really are.  Don't accept that because you may not be a run way model that it's okay to not care about yourself.  Love the you who God made you to be.  If you have a problem with your body, then do something about it.  But no matter what size clothes you wear the reality is that you will have to change how you feel about yourself if you want other people to change how they treat you.  If you are willing to accept treatment that is beneath who you are, then it is not because someone else decided you aren't worth more, but because you decided you weren't worth more.

I decided that foolery was not something that I wanted to operate in because it is one of the primary reasons women end up in relationships that devalue them, deflate them, and break them down into nothing well beneath who they are as a woman of God.  I'm certain women of God, this is not what you want for yourselves.  But a man would be willing to do this for you.  Even though a man realizes what a prize you are....when you don't realize it, he will take full advantage of your insecurity just so he can have the luxury of having a woman that is out of his league.  Hear me in the Spirit today with your heart and not just your head.  Really pray that God gives you a real revelation of who you are and cause you to walk in it, so that you will not carry yourself like a servant and have a servant mentality when you are a Queen.

Stay strong and do not let go of God's word concerning you.  Share the blog with others that you feel might be blessed!

ARE YOU A TESTER?

Ladies, as always you know that I'm going to keep it real with you today.  So, I want to share some things with you on today.  I want to ask you if you have agreed to be somebody's tester today?  Let me tell you what I mean.  Nowadays, the thing is that being "in a relationship" means that for many people they have access to whatever they want.  People believe they are entitled to the same things that married people are entitled to simply because they have agreed to be solely committed to you.  People believe that being in a relationship they should be able to test run you to see if you are what they're looking for.  You know like the tester perfumes they have on the counter at department stores.  You try one and see if you like it and if you don't you move on to the next fragrance.

I always find it interesting the things I hear coming out of a man's mouth.  It's funny that when you call them on the things they say, they seem confused and frustrated that you would question their integrity and motives.  What I find even more interesting is there is no effort or accountability to God's word.  It has become very relaxed in the hearts of many so "church folk".  The lack of Godly values has nearly diminished from the pulpit to the door.  It is not only implied but expected that you be a willing participant in someone's else's inability to obey God's word.  There is a sense of entitlement when it comes to being "in a relationship" that should not be, not in the church.  Such things should not even be named among the saints of God (Ep 5:3)

But yet, so many of my sisters have become testers.  Have allowed themselves to become testers to those who seek to screen you out in the flesh instead of trying you by the Spirit.  When they are done sampling you, they move on to the next tester to see if they like that one better.  It saddens me to see so many sisters in the church fall prey to these predators who victimize the women of God and pretend it's all spiritual.  It is not spiritual, unless you consider the demonic aspects.  We do not need to be tested out to see if we will work for them.  We do not need to test them out to see if they will work for us.  If the hand of God is on the thing, then it is a done deal.  Anyone who would imply that they need a test drive before they decide to put a ring on it, is not THE MAN that God sent.  It is a man that simply wants to spoil your goods.

What we want ladies, is for someone to see who we really are, more than hips, lips, and fingertips.  We are more than a curvy body to be desired, but we are God's handmaidens.  We are intercessors, prayer warriors, preachers, teachers, mothers, and daughters.  There is more to us than what we look like.  There is more to us than what our bodies can do and what can be done with our bodies.  Women of God, you, us, we should seek a man after God's own heart, who is passionate about God and desires a woman who will not compromise herself.  We should not entertain a man who insist that we do compromise our standards, principles, character, values, and committment to the Lord.  Desire a man who wants to please God before he starts talking about pleasing you.  Truly a man who doesn't desire to please God, could NEVER please you anyway! One day you will wake up frustrated and broken over everything you had to give up because you let down your standard.

Hold on, be strong in the Lord and in the power of HIS might.  Let us continue to hold firmly to the hope that we confess without wavering, for the one who made the promise is faithful (Heb 10:23). God is indeed faithful until the end.  Don't settle for something that looks like it is, but wait for what it really is.

NO MORE COMPROMISE

Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us, Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God. Heb 12:1-2

I know you have told yourself this before and again that you will no longer compromise what God has promised and settle for something that's in the moment because it looks good and MAYBE it's the will of God for me.  Because you want to finally say, sadee, sadee married lady.  Well, it doesn't pay to compromise what you have been told, believed, and waited for.  You know at the end of the day, you will inevitably end up with disappointment, hurt, shame, and pain.  The reality is nothing or no one can replace the promise. Despite how you try to mask it as HIS will and explain all the missing elements as if God has somehow changed his mind about what he said concerning your life.

I was sitting here at my computer when suddenly the Lord began to speak to me concerning this subject.  It is ideally coming at the most opportune time in my life because I am always being presented with some form of counterfeit.  But the thing about a counterfeit is unless your eye is really trained you cannot detect that it's a fraud.  Did you hear me?  When banks train tellers, they do not train them using fake money, they train them using the real McCoy, so when something that's not real comes across the counter, they can detect it right away that it's not authentic.  Our counterfeit detector is the Holyghost, unfortunately, for some of us, we decide to not listen to him when he is speaking to us concerning our lives.  We turn the volume down and allow the enemy to put that play money in our lives.

Let's look at the scripture in Hebrews.  There are so many tidbits of awesomeness in this portion of scripture that I could share this morning.  First of all, it is sin that we rebel against the Holyghost and not listen when God is clearly giving us instruction in life.  We are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses…….There are so many of us that can attest that we are going through the same struggles, in our minds, the same distractions, the same temptations, and the very same predicaments in life.  Let those lives who have suffered these things be an example and testament to what not to do given those same circumstances.  They can attest to the fact that the road that you are headed down is not what God has ordained because they have been down that road before. 

There are folks whose lives are speaking to you right now saying that if you do not lay aside your own desires, your opinions, your interpretations, your own ideas which are only meant to be a distraction and lead you down the path of destruction, you will ultimately live beneath where God has purposed you to be.  Now watch this, those things are designed as an easy way out, so that you forget about what God has told you.  So, instead of being patient as our scripture says you fall into the easy road because it’s familiar territory.  We’ve been in that kind of relationship before, so it’s easy to fall back into it, instead of having the patience to wait on God to manifest the real blessing, we get distracted and of course and forget about what we are really trying to attain.  We are much like Peter as he began to sink because he forgot and did not continue to look onto Jesus. 

If the Lord could endure the cross then surely some of us can endure for a time until God manifest what he has promised.  Come on here!  I know you hear me this morning.  Oh, trust me; I know easy looks really good right about now.  Easy looks amazing.  Easy is the man that says all the right things at the right time and gives you have butterflies in your stomach, but is it God?  That is always going to be the question that you need to ask the Lord at those time when your head is saying no, but your body is saying yes.  You need to back up for a minute and say, hey wait just a minute, God doesn’t operate that way.  Because Boaz is going to appeal to your spirit first! The enemy operates in the realm of the flesh, but the God operates by his Spirit.  I know I’m in the book right there.  So, for those who will tell you, that because he’s so fine and that’s what drew me to him, I say, the devil is liar this morning.  God does not operate in the realm of the flesh. 

You better peep that heart under the smile and see what’s in there and what you’re spirit is saying about who he is.  As the song says, the Jesus in me loves the Jesus in you.  But if there is no Jesus in him, what are you loving? What is it about him that’s appealing to you if God is not in him?

Alright, beloveds, many blessing to you on today. God bless you dear hearts and be encouraged and I pray you have an awesome and productive day!!

I'LL CALL YOU

Doesn't it bother you when you deal with people with no integrity? Well, as it goes today this quality is few and far between even in the church! So, with that in mind let's look at the scripture.

Beloved, believe not every spirit, but test the spirits whether they are of God: because many false prophets are gone out into the world. (I Jn 4:1)

Watch out for false prophets. They come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ferocious wolves. (Math 7:15)

Having lived through these scriptures, I can certainly attest to God's word being real in every situation of life.  Beloveds do not believe everything that you hear.  Sometimes we get a little goofy, silly, and distracted when it comes to men and we tend to let all our guards down and forget that we are women of God.  When I say that, I mean it in the sense that we forget to have our ears open always to what God is saying to us.  We cannot be separate from who we are based on who we're with.  In other words, we have to be who we are all the time.  So, our ears should remain tuned in every situation.  We should never become hard of hearing no matter what's going on around us in the world and who we are with.  Ladies truthfully, our ears should be alert even in the house of God and some would say especially in the house of God.  This tends to be where the enemy is likely to attack and try to feed you things that the Lord did not say.  I have had people tell me, the Lord said, you're my wife.  The Lord said this woman of God, you're the one.  I believe you're the one, etc.  Well, if I was a silly woman, I would be all wrapped up in that and missing God right now being yoked with someone the Lord never intended me to be with.

There's so much false information that we receive when dealing with the opposite sex as well as all people.  I know some of you have been told on some or even many ocassions, "I'll call you" after what you perceived as a great date.  The problem with that is that most men who feed you that line never intend to call you, but they've pre-programmed to lie and feed you that lie.  We know that the enemy is in fact the father of lies, so the fact that you do not receive a call let's you know just who you were dealing with in the first place.  If a man can look you in the face and feed you a lie knowing his intentions, then he is operating according to his father the devil.  I will tell you this a man with integrity will not lie to you.  A man with an ounce of Holyghost will not have the same standard as the world.  Now, some men will say that I'm wrong for saying some of this, but it's just the gospel truth.  A lie is a lie, regardless to how you try to justify your reasons for telling it.  If he doesn't intend to call, then don't say it, otherwise he is a liar.

Matthew 7:15 tells us they come in sheeps clothing.  In other words, they come looking like they meet the status quo.  They look like one of us, but inside somebody else abides.  They are not who they appear to be.  The outward man does not tell the true story of who they really are.  Sometimes all we look at is what is on the outside and tend to ignore or not even discern what or who the inner man is.  We can be very superficial when it comes to what we think we want and dismissive of what we feel we don't want.  Unfortunately, often we dismiss something that doesn't look as good on the outside, but awesome on the inside for the opposite.  It's like being presented a meal that smells awesome and looks good, but when you taste it, it's flavorless and not as delicious as it appeared to be.  But this is how we are, we want what looks good on the outside and ignore the man on the inside. I'm so guilty of this. It behooved us to dig a little deeper into the character of a person to find out whether he does indeed look as good on the inside as he does on the outside. 

Hey look, I've been down that road and bamboozeled and hookwinked.  It's time out for that now, time to grow up.  We can't walk around with school girl eyes, not discerning elementary experiences and situations.  We've got to put on our big girl clothes being the whole armor of God and keep it on no matter where, who, or what we encounter.  Test the spirit by the Spirit.  God gives us permission to do this in his word.  What does it mean to test or try? It means according to webster to present a set of questions, problems, or the like, used as a means of evaluating the abilities, aptitudes, skills, or performance of an individual or group; examination. It is a means to determine whether somebody qualifies in an area that they claim to excel in.  You've got a right to test somebody to see if they are who they say they are.  So, try the spirit by what, the Holyghost (Spirit) to see whether that spirit is coming from the Spirit.  Let the Holyghost in you give you those answers to those questions in your spirit. Ask the question and listen to what the Lord says, not what man says. When you do this initially, you don't even have to worry about whether you will get a call or not, because you will know what his character is prior to the end of the evening.  So, if he says it and you have tested him and saw that he is a man of integrity, then you will know that he is a man of his word.  If you have tested him and found him to be the son of his father the devil, then you know that he is a liar.

So, no need to be discouraged because someone has shown you who they really are.  Maya Angelo said, when they show you who they are, believe them.  So let us believe just what we've been shown and know that we are better off without that spirit being in our lives.  Down the road a ways, God has something better in store. 

SOMEBODY DONE LIED TO YOU!

I was contemplating on some things as it relates to my life and sometimes how we don’t realize that the things that happen in our lives are really for our benefit.  It is to our benefit and not detriment that God would allow us to go “through” some of things that we have faced to teach us, grow us, and empower us to be the vessel he desires us to be.  Lemons can never be lemonade unless you put pressure on them, squeeze them out of their natural state, and get what is on the inside of them to come out.  They will always be just a lemon until what’s on the inside is released to the outside.

So let’s think about that analogy for a minute.  I often talk about things being a process in life and it’s because our trials do come truly to make us strong and so that the tarnish can be removed from off of us to expose the incredible gold behind it.  We struggle against simple name calling, people leaving our lives, and things not working out as we had hoped them to.  Inevitably, things are working out, but not necessarily like we want them, but as God sees fit for who he called us to be before foundation of the world.

So, the lemons that we are can become the lemonade that will quench the thirst of many as opposed to simply being a supply for ourselves only.  Let me tell you something about lemons….one is never enough to make a batch to supply the many.  God will continue to put pressure on us to produce and expand. He will enlarge our territory so that we are able to carry the weight of glory it takes to go through every situation and pour out to others.  So, God takes that one lemon and multiples giving us exactly what we need to make things manifest that he has set before us. 

Somebody done lied to you and told you that God did not have his hand on your life and the reason why everything keeps falling apart is because you are out of his will.  But the Lord told me to tell you today, that it’s by his divine design that things fell apart.  It’s by his order that everything looks upside down. It is his handiwork that your life seems a mess.  It’s like you feel like you’ve fallen and can’t get up. If he had allowed some of the things to happen the way we wanted them to happen, then we would not have completed the process of development.  We would be dwarfed.  Our growth would have been stunted and we would never reach our full potential in him. But he had to allow a train to come through your life. He had to allow you to lose your job.  He had to allow your husband to cheat and walk out. He had to allow the sickness to come on you.  But there is one thing about a process, there is a time to be in, go through it, and a time to wash it out.  When your hair is fully straight, it's time to wash it out!

There is something different about green lemons.  They don’t taste like yellow lemons.  Green lemons they don’t produce the same taste and flavor as one that’s fully ripe and yellow.  Now, I'm not talking about limes, but under-developed lemons.  If God had allowed some of us to step out before time daughters, you would not be ready walk into your destiny and sustain the integrity that is needed to stay in position.

Though it would appear that you believed your heart was ready and your spirit was ready to move forward, the process was not over until the Lord had made a complete work in you! Do you hear what I’m saying to you this morning? Don’t fight the process. Don’t allow the enemy to lie to you and tell you it’s too late or it will never happen.  Everything in your life is by his design and order.  The struggle is over in this next season.  Look unto God, who is the author and finisher of our faith, he is able to deliver what he promised and able to keep you from falling even when the ground is shifting under your feet. Wait upon the Lord and I promise you, he will deliver!

WHAT DOES THE BIBLE SAY?

So, I want to share with you today some things the bible says and how these particular scriptures relate to dating.  I will try to be brief and to the point today!

First, in our efforts to weed out all potential suitors who have too many prayer issues for us to deal with to even consider going out with, we won't even address them.  And, of course, these scriptures can and should be applied across all areas of your life.  We are given life applicable scriptures and therefore we always refer to the word of God as a blueprint for our lives.  It is important that we use the word as a tool and guide for instruction, corrections, and edification in all things that pertain to life.  So, with that being said, let's dig in.

I Corinthians 15:33 tells us that bad company corrupts character.  The word says birds of a feather flock together.  In other words, being in the company of someone who does not hold to the same values as you will lead you down a path of compromise.  I know we all have been there, whether its friends, relative, close relationship, men friends, spouses, etc.  Who we are connected to influences either in positive or negative ways.  I watched myself be broken down and compromise my own standard in relationships in the past.  Sometimes you don't really think you're doing it until you disconnected yourself and look back.  You realize that you never would have done some of things you did had you not been connected to who you were with.  We can say even some our behavior, attitudes, language, etc is influenced by who we are connected to.  We all seek to belong and want to feel close and connected to people, so in an effort to do that, we let down our standard and who we are to appease and fit in with more of who they are and less of who we are. 

Your character gets compromise and you are no longer who you are, but you are a fragment of who you use to be.  You find yourself laying aside the things which God has instructed you and told you.  You find yourself laying aside the woman of God you truly are for who somebody else wants you to be.  All of this because you choose to entertain someone with questionable character.  I hope you don't get angry with me on today, but I have lay out as I hear the Lord speaking it to me.  So, let me say this, if you think that constantly exposing yourself to the influences of whose with questionable character will not eventually take hold to you, let you are walking in pride.  You cannot lay under the sun and think you won't get a tan.  Even people with dark skin will tan.  If you don't believe me, lay out there unshielded for a while in the Texas sun and you will get the revelation.  Whatever you put in you is what will come out of you.  If you are constantly putting things in your spirit that are corrupt, it will produce fruit after it's kind.  Whether it is good or bad. 

Second, the purpose for dating is for the purpose of marriage.  Now, I understand that the secular view does not reflect the Christian value on this particular subject.  A dating relationship in mainstream, is just that, a dating relationship.  Many people in the mainstream just want to hang out as they say.  They are not particularly looking for anything serious.  They say, "let's hang out and see where it goes".  But as a Christian, we do not do the "let's hang out thing, to see where it goes".  The bible says in 2 Cor 6:14, not to be unequally yoked with unbelievers.  Now, I know you're saying that this guy is not an unbeliever.  I'm sure he does believe in God, but if he does not believe in whole counsel of God's word, then you definitely have a problem of someone who is not equally yoked with you.  There are a great many people that believe in God, but believing does not automatically put someone in equally yoked status.  The demons believe and tremble.  Is it our desire to walk with one of them?  A son and daughter is someone who loves God whole heartedly, seeks out and strives to walk in the principles of his word, and is Godly sorry when he/she misses the mark.  We can dispel every preconcieved idea that we had about just finding a good brother in the church.  The devil goes to church too on a regular bases, attends more often than you, and sits wherever he wants even in the pulpit.  So, let's just be real clear on that point.

So my point being this, a true lover of Jesus Christ is what you want, not just someone who believes in God.  Don't settle for the, "I'm a Christian".  You want to dig deeper to see if there is any substance in there.  In dating, we do want to ask those questions and not be afraid of the answers we might get.  It might not be what we want to hear, but we still need to have the conversation.

Finally, Ephesians 5:3 says, “But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people.” Another translation says don't let it be named among you! This is a conversation that needs to be had as well.  There are subtle ways that you can find this information out.  I've learned to be very proficient at weeding.  Folk say whatever you want to hear initially, but when you dig a little deeper, you find out who they really are.  When I went on a date a few months ago with a "Christian" brother and I use that term very loosely as it relates to him, he immediately begin to ask me if I had seen the movie, "Think Like a Man".  At the time, I hadn't.  He continued with how he doesn't believe in the 90 day rule, etc.  You see, people will tell on themselves without you even having to question them, sometimes.  You can find out what's in somebody's heart.

In your dating  dating experience endeavor to remember these things and know that its okay to ask the questions that you need aswers to or be patient and listen because everything hidden will eventually be revealed be blessed my sisters!

Pastor Symintha Radford

DON'T BE SCARED

Beloved, believe not every spirit, but try the spirits whether they are of God: because many false prophets are gone out into the world (I Jn 4:1)

Beloveds don't believe the hype and what people tell you about them or not even what other people tell you about someone.  I say that because you never know the motives behind why someone else is defaming a person to you.  Their motive could be that they want them for themselves or other reasons.  Could be they do not have Godly intent toward you, so you must discern and try every spirit to see whether the Lord has spoken or not.

Some of us, I don't know whether it is insecurity, desperation, confusion, lack of understanding, or fear, find it difficult to dismiss things or people out of our space.  Let me be clear, when we have seen that spirit manifest and it reveals itself to us then we have no obligation to entertain it.  If deliverance is not in the making, then an exit should be.

I know some of you have or will go on dates or even have initial conversations with people which at some point their true character will be displayed during that conversation.  Why oh why do we continue to sit and listen and play with enemy when we have already discerned the character of the individual and it is not a person who is in line with who you are?  For a long time I could not understand that about myself.  Until I realized one day, it's because we have this God complex.  We think that we can save people.  I thought somehow I was not displaying love by not being longsuffering.  But when I realized that I'm under no obligation to be longsuffering with foolishness, I have learned to simply walk away.  There is no need to invite the enemy to do damage to your life.  That is, unless, you enjoy drama, foolishness, and misery.

After suffering many years in bad relationships, I have learned to shake the dust off of my feet and keep it moving.  For example, ladies sitting through a date with someone or even a telephone conversation that is not conducive to the things of God is not a conversation that we need to be having.  In other words, there is really no point in sitting there for an hour of your precious time that you could be spending in prayer.  When you discover that it is finished or that it's not going to begin, let them see your skirt tail leave the conversation. 

Do not allow fear of being alone to stop you from using wisdom concerning your life.  You are more important than that.  Do not give other people more credit, importance, and respect than you give yourself.  That doesn't mean not to love people, but it simply means that do not devalue yourself so others can feel important.  You are valuable and what you think, how you feel, and who you choose to spend your time with is your decision.  You do have a choice with whom you spend your time with.  So, if for some reason the date, the conversation, the relationship is not what you choose to do, then do not allow fear of loneliness or being alone stop you from stepping back.

Too many times we stay in things because of that or insecurity.  When we do that, we are putting someone else's needs above ours and devaluing ourselves.  We are saying how we feel is less important than how they feel or what they need.  You need something too and if you are not getting what you need, then it is not what it's supposed to be. 

So, if you just remember one thing I’ve said today, remember this; do not be afraid to walk away.  If you have to excuse yourself to go to the restroom and slide out to your car, if you have to end the telephone conversation, if you have to say I’m not doing this, whatever way in which you need to handle it, don’t be afraid to do it. You deserve peace, you deserve happiness, you deserve respect, and you deserve someone in your life that can give all of that to you. Don’t stay or get connected because of what other people have told you or what that person tells you.  You connect or disconnect based on what God has told you.  It doesn’t matter what someone else wants because you have a choice about who you invite into your space.

Be blessed beloveds!

Pastor Symintha